Things I Don't Understand About My Child

Do you ever look at your child and ask yourself "what is the deal with this child?"? I've found myself doing that more and more lately. Just when I think I've got this child figured out he will do something and throw me for a loop. Here are some things I don't quite get about my child.

1// Why does he like touching his poop? I know it smells, believe me, I know. What part of something so awful smelling screams touch me?

2// How can he absolutely hate chicken fries and then an hour later get mad that he doesn't have ten more to eat? It isn't like he is pregnant.

3// How can he be interested in listening to me read Pete the Cat I Love My White Shoes after hearing it 12 gazillion times? I've begged him to pick another but nooooo. Just so you know, I hate Pete the Cat now. Goodness, no!

4// If I am rooms away he knows when I'm drinking from a Sonic cup as opposed to a regular cup. It is kind of a gift, an odd gift, but a gift none the less.

5// He has the ability to know exactly when I'm about to loose my stuff and will turn into this sweet loving child who covers me with kisses and hugs. So dang manipulative!

6// If I want him to take a bath he will go hide in the bed, under covers. When I don't want him in the bath he is in the bathroom, turning on the water, butt naked. Straight up difficult!

7// He knows all the words to the Little Einsteins intro but refuses to pee in the potty. There is a serious lack of communication going on.

8// Jack is obsessed with bubbles. If I'm blowing bubbles he is so happy. The two loves of his life are together. When he gets the bottle of bubbles in his own hands he pours them right out and then screams because they are gone. What sense does this make? He has done this too many times to be surprised.

9// Why does he only want the toy that his cousin has and when he can have that toy he don't want it? I know this is an issue with other kids as well. Watching it first hand has me bamboozled.

10// He only eats fruit at school. I can offer him the same thing at home and he won't touch it. I think he likes to make them happy and he likes to watch me beg.

Is there anything about your kid that you don't understand?