January 3rd I made a parenting change in my life. Jack turned 4 on November 7th but it took something on January 3rd to see that Jack was growing up. I don't even know exactly what it was but I looked at him and I just realized how much he had grown up. I decided I was going to commit myself to leaning into Jack being four. He'll be five before I know it and five is big kid. I want to to fully take in each moment of Jack being four.
Oh what a difference this has made in our lives. Y'all if I would have known the good that would have come from this then I would have done it forever ago. So what exactly has changed? Well I will try and explain.
As a mom it is impossible to do everything your child wants you to do. Before this change I would do stuff with Jack but I never really loved playing trains or match for the 100th time. Once I saw it as such a fleeting moment my whole prespective changed. Now don't get me wrong, I still can't play Pop the Pig every single time he asks but I'm saying yes a whole LOT more. My goal is to really embrace each moment I can and be completely in the moment.
It's so great seeing the change in Jack as well as in myself. Since I've calmed down, Jack has calmed down. I use to be so anxious, feeling rushed through one moment to get to the next one. I'm letting so many things go to focus on Jack and it has been so freeing. We've had so many great moments since January 3rd and I feel like we are both just really enjoying each other.
We've played so much. I've played numberous games of Pop the Pig and match. I don't always even want to play but I think about his joy and it makes me want to do what he wants to do. The other day we jumped on the trampoline for like an hour and had a leaf fight. Jack had so much joy and it just filled my heart.
When he is being difficult I am no longer matching his frustration. I'm staying calm and it has made such a difference. I can get him calm a lot faster and we aren't butting heads as much. The more he gets use to this new way, the more he has relaxed and has been such a different kid. Instead of Jack looking for mischief he is turning to me more to say what he wants. He requires a lot of my attention. He is a naturally mischievious child. Thankfully me leaning into him has eased a lot of that and I think because he is getting so much positive attention that he isn't seeking negative attention.
Life has been so much more pleasant since that great day when I saw Jack as a baby who will soon be my big boy. This transformation in my parenting goes directly with my word for 2017-foundation. I'm completely dedicated to building a strong foundation for us.
I feel the same way with Connor. He is a bit older than Jack but I, too, struggle with how big he is getting. He steal needs me and his heart is still so young so that's what I hold onto when I get a glimpse of the big boy is will be one day.
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy for you two!! What a sweet post. I love the fact that your positive changes have made such a huge impact. Saying yes more to the important things is really working out for you. Thank you for the reminder to say yes more, stress less and enjoy these sweet little people. Way to go!!
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