Life has been quite stressful lately. There are several things stressing me out and although I really try to not let it bother me, it does. I don't handle stress well. My life had been a massive stressball with the ending of my marriage. After a few months I was able to get my footing and things started looking up. Things are nowhere near as stressful as they were a few months ago but they aren't as good as they were a few weeks ago. The last thing I want is to get in a stress slump so I'm here to vent and get things back together.
So here I go:
1. There is no word on my divorce. I have called and sent emails and have learned nothing. The secretary will email me back with a "we are waiting for this, that, or another" but no real answers. I'm ready for that part of my life to be over so I can move on in my heart and accordance to the law :)
2. I was doing fabulous with going to the gym and then I went and broke a tooth and all hell broke loose. First it was a root canal and then a pulled tooth. The healing took a couple of days and once I felt back up to going I stepped on some glass that got stuck in my foot for a few days. Getting an amazing workout makes me feel so good and positive so I'm really missing those great vibes.
3. When I was first going through the split with my husband I needed to be in my parent's home. That level of comfort was so very needed at that time. I can not begin to explain how much they have helped me out. I'm so thankful. I know we are going to have to stay there a little longer due to finances but I'm starting to get that yearning for my own place. Knowing that it just won't happen right now is a bummer for me.
4. As school is winding down, the bosses are expecting a bunch of last minute things. Trying to get all these little things done on top of my regular classes isn't easy. I know what I really need to do is make a big work to do list but the idea of facing it all just feels too daunting. I'm not ready to face it all yet.
5. I've been giving a lot of thought to Jack growing up without having his father fully in his life. If the past eight months is any idea of his role in Jack's life then I know Jack won't be able to except much from him. It bothers me and although there really isn't anything I can do, it still hurts my heart. I want my baby boy to have everything he needs, including an emotional healthy relationship with his father.
6. My finances are in the dumps. I went and got a bachelor and masters degree and it feels like for nothing. With everything going on my student loans went into default and now they are garnishing $400 a month out of my check and they took my federal tax refund. I was really needing that money so it was such a bummer when I got that letter in the mail.
I hate coming to this space with problems but this is my life. The good and not so good. Thankfully, Jack and I are blessed to be healthy and surrounded by love. Those are the important things. God has a plan for us and I will just have to trust in it. My faith and His grace is all I really need during this stressful time. He will see us through it. Thanks for letting me vent. Love!