Monday, May 4, 2015

Stress and All that Jazz

Life has been quite stressful lately. There are several things stressing me out and although I really try to not let it bother me, it does. I don't handle stress well. My life had been a massive stressball with the ending of my marriage. After a few months I was able to get my footing and things started looking up. Things are nowhere near as stressful as they were a few months ago but they aren't as good as they were a few weeks ago. The last thing I want is to get in a stress slump so I'm here to vent and get things back together.



So here I go:

1. There is no word on my divorce. I have called and sent emails and have learned nothing. The secretary will email me back with a "we are waiting for this, that, or another" but no real answers. I'm ready for that part of my life to be over so I can move on in my heart and accordance to the law :)

2. I was doing fabulous with going to the gym and then I went and broke a tooth and all hell broke loose. First it was a root canal and then a pulled tooth. The healing took a couple of days and once I felt back up to going I stepped on some glass that got stuck in my foot for a few days. Getting an amazing workout makes me feel so good and positive so I'm really missing those great vibes.

3. When I was first going through the split with my husband I needed to be in my parent's home. That level of comfort was so very needed at that time. I can not begin to explain how much they have helped me out. I'm so thankful. I know we are going to have to stay there a little longer due to finances but I'm starting to get that yearning for my own place. Knowing that it just won't happen right now is a bummer for me.

4. As school is winding down, the bosses are expecting a bunch of last minute things. Trying to get all these little things done on top of my regular classes isn't easy. I know what I really need to do is make a big work to do list but the idea of facing it all just feels too daunting. I'm not ready to face it all yet.

5. I've been giving a lot of thought to Jack growing up without having his father fully in his life. If the past eight months is any idea of his role in Jack's life then I know Jack won't be able to except much from him. It bothers me and although there really isn't anything I can do, it still hurts my heart. I want my baby boy to have everything he needs, including an emotional healthy relationship with his father.

6. My finances are in the dumps. I went and got a bachelor and masters degree and it feels like for nothing. With everything going on my student loans went into default and now they are garnishing $400 a month out of my check and they took my federal tax refund. I was really needing that money so it was such a bummer when I got that letter in the mail.

I hate coming to this space with problems but this is my life. The good and not so good. Thankfully, Jack and I are blessed to be healthy and surrounded by love. Those are the important things. God has a plan for us and I will just have to trust in it. My faith and His grace is all I really need during this stressful time. He will see us through it. Thanks for letting me vent. Love!


4 comments:

  1. Hang in there! I divorced my son's father when he was 2 and things were rocky for a while. But they do get better! Feel free to vent all you need to -- it really does help.

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  2. Those last minute "to-dos" at the end of school are the worst! I used to get so stressed at the end of the school year! I hope everything starts looking up soon! Maybe summer will be a good time for y'all to start over. I know you really don't want to (I wouldn't want to), but have you given any thought to a part time job during the summer? Maybe that would help with your financial situation. I just want you to be stress free, friend! :)

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  3. OMG you poor thing. I cringed at the idea of stepping on glass. EEK. And the teeth problems too. Poor thing. Praying for ya!

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  4. That is a lot of stressful things on your plate right now. I'll be praying for you and for the situations to resolve themselves over time. The end of the school year is CRAZY. It sounds like a long to do list might be necessary so you don't have to keep thinking about things or trying to remember everything. Jack is lucky to have you and your family for love and support. I'm sorry about your tooth issue, your stepping on glass and your disappointing outcomes. Give yourself a healthy dose of GRACE and remind yourself to take things one day at a time. You're doing your best and that's all you can do right now. (( Hugs ))

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